The Second Half of My Life

For the past 14 years, I’ve been on a spiritual journey, and during that time, I’ve also remained celibate. It’s been a journey of discipline, self-discovery, and learning to understand who I truly am.

Throughout those years, I’ve developed a deeper connection with my spirituality, especially my intuition. And I believe those gifts became stronger because I took the time to go within, understand myself, and develop the discipline to live according to my own beliefs rather than being influenced by the world around me.

But here’s something I’ve struggled with.

People have questioned my spirituality because I don’t necessarily look or live the way they believe a spiritually enlightened person should.

And somewhere along the way, I started questioning whether certain parts of myself were compatible with my spiritual journey.

Then last night, I entered the dream world with questions, and the answer came in the most unexpected way. 😁

At the end of my dream, I was holding on to my luggage when a young man started dancing. I felt the music, caught the vibe, and began dancing too, all while holding on to my belongings.

And that’s when it hit me.

Neither part of me has to disappear for the other to exist.

My spiritual gifts weren’t given to me because I entered a religious sect, followed a particular doctrine, or adopted someone else’s idea of enlightenment.

I believe they were cultivated through discipline, self-awareness, and the willingness to look within and discover who I really am.

And none of that requires me to give up my personality, sensuality, creativity, or desire to enjoy life.

Spiritual discipline doesn’t mean denying yourself the experience of being human. It means knowing yourself well enough not to lose yourself in those experiences.

I can remain grounded in my beliefs, protect what I’ve worked so hard to build, and still be open to attraction, chemistry, new experiences, and everything life has to offer.

I can enjoy the journey without becoming attached to the outcome.

And that brings me back to the ending of my dream.

I didn’t put down my luggage to dance. I started dancing while still holding on to what mattered to me.

That was my answer.

I don’t have to abandon one part of myself to embrace another.

My spirituality isn’t about separating myself from life. It’s about being able to experience life without losing myself in it. 😁💃